Category Archives: dating

It’s a Small, Small World.

What is it they say about LA? Big city, small town?

Here’s a story about how everyone knows everyone in this town.

Last year, a guy on named Gabe* emailed me and upon checking out his profile, I found one picture featuring tall Gabe on the left and my short friend Justin* on the right. I immediately took a screenshot, and emailed my girlfriend D. demanding “Do you know this man??” She did not but we did find him on Facebook and discovered that he works with Justin. Making a very bad judgment call that I would later regret, I opted not to email Gabe back.

Fast forward to a week later. Justin invited me and my friends to a “welcome our new roommate” party and night out. Of course, I walked in the door and immediately saw Gabe. I then also immediately saw Derek*, a guy I had hooked up with a long time ago.

After several drinks, we ventured to a bar in Santa Monica. At the bar, I saw Gabe standing in the corner of the bar with our friend Aaron* showing off something on his phone. Gabe eventually calls me over and promptly shows me all of my pictures and demands to know why I didn’t email him back. I laughed it off and said that I recognized Justin from the photo, hadn’t been online much that week (not a lie!), and figured we’d meet in real life (and not the intrawebs) eventually. He then asks to buy me a drink which of course I accept and then proceeds to tell everyone around that he is buying citygirl (my Match screenname) a drink. He tells the 22 year old dude that took a shot with him that. He told all of our friends that. I ask him to stop shouting that and then he gets in my face about why I’m embarrassed to be online dating.

To his credit, once he stopped screaming my username and we had a normal conversation, he was actually pretty funny and cute (in a tall, goofy way). I actually did wind up giving him my number. Then at some point, he decided to bring up that I had hooked up with Derek last year. Um seriously??  So here’s a lesson ladies – guys DO talk.

At that point, I turned to my friends and announced I wanted to leave and apparently we peaced out without saying bye to anyone (that’s sort of my drunken MO). I got home, got a phone call from Gabe, and then drunkenly accepted his invitation to meet for lunch the next day.

So, I actually did meet him for lunch that following day. BUT Justin can be a dense idiot and decided to invite himself and 6 others along (including Derek, the previous year’s hookup). All in all, it was a nice, awkward, hungover brunch.

And Gabe and I never went out again.


* all names have been changed to protect the innocent guilty

Back in the Saddle.

I actually haven’t been on an online dating site in months but I also haven’t been on a date in well…too long and I’m bored this fall. So I figured why not give the old eHarmony a try again.

Turns out the last time I logged in was January 2010 and my profile still indicated I was A. from San Diego so I had some editing to do. They now have some really fun new questions to answer that are both good for your potential date to know about you and very thought-provoking to ponder on a sleepy autumn Monday evening. Here are just a few snapshots from the evening:

ImageAnyone who knows my love of Lost will understand how vehemently important this question is to me. Really – who would you rather be stuck on a desert island with? Sawyer or Ginger? You know I’m right.

A date who doesn’t drink?? But how are you supposed to make it through a first date without the glass of wine to take the edge off? Alright, you got me eHarmony, one of my most important values include wine.

I guess I’m officially back in the saddle! Wish me luck, friends.

Mr. Face Twitch.

Ladies of Los Angeles, I gotta ask – does anyone find they get asked out on dates to the same exact wine bar over and over again? It’s like the men of LA only know of 1 first date spot. In my case, it’s Bodega wine bar in Santa Monica. I think I’ve been on at least 10 blind dates there. I’m surprised the bartenders don’t recognize me as that awkward girl who keeps coming back for sad dates.

Anyways, this brings me to Mr. Face Twitch. He invited me to – surprise surprise — Bodega.

I actually ran out of work thinking I was late at 6:15 for a 6:30 date (thank you difficult client). I somehow made it there and parked promptly at 6:30. He was not there but I found a place to sit. By 6:55, I ordered a glass of wine and made friends with the 50something man next to me named Frank. Awkwardly, I had to put my credit card down to hold the order.

To Mr. Face Twitch’s credit, I followed my Online Dating Rule of not giving out my number for safety and security purposes, so he didn’t have my phone number. I did have his though, and finally texted him at 7:00 to say “ohh hey…i’m here, grabbed a spot to sit.” He apologized and said he had gotten held up at work but didn’t have my number to give me the heads-up.

He finally showed up at 7:10 (40 minutes late…), and “photo” Mr. Face Twitch was cuter than “real life” Mr. Face Twitch. Basically, he was perfectly nice but awkward and nerdy and made weird faces and twitched. 30 minutes in, I knew I wanted out and after an hour finally said something about having to meet friends for Trivia Night (blatant lie). We couldn’t find the waitress to close the tab. By the time she finally came around, she asked how we wanted to settle given my credit card was holding the tab. He had 2 beers; I had 1 glass of wine (mine was at happy hour price; his 2 beers were not due to his tardiness).

I requested the check and he left his credit card on the table and went to bathroom. The waitress asked me how to do the bill while he was gone. I was stupid enough just to stutter (I really wanted to LEAVE!!), “Uummm….just split it halfway.” So basically I paid for this guy to drink beer.

He returned from the bathroom, we signed the checks (REALLY?? I’m on online dating sites for the free drinks/food!! I expect to see some ROI out of this), and I then I ran away.

The worst part of it all? Mr. Face Twitch and I have been matched up on 3 separate dating sites. Apparently, we’re good together on paper and disastrous in real life.

An Intriguing Offer.

While on a walk during my lunch at work near the Santa Monica Promenade, a homeless guy offered to set me up with his friend because he thought I was very pretty and that we would make a good pair.

I thought about it for a few moments but ultimately decided that it wasn’t a great idea.