Because it’s always refreshing to hear what a man thinks of us lovely ladies in LA.
[ my favorite parts: Urkel, we won’t drink on dates because we’re afraid of DUIs]
Tag Archives: dating
An Update: Mr. Face Twitch.
I repeat: Los Angeles is a big city, small town.
I had the most awful revelation a few months ago: Mr. Face Twitch and I work at the same company. Thankfully, this is a large enough company with multiple buildings that I ran into him about Month 4 of this new job and I only see him now about once a month. I have politely tried to make eye contact and smile on all occasions but he makes a blatant effort to not acknowledge my presence.
The first time I ran into him in the office hallway, the world’s most awkward date (circa March 2011) came flooding back to me. He HAD mentioned he had just started a new job in IT at a company near the Santa Monica Promenade and that it sounded like the company was in a similar field as my previous 2011 job (online advertising).
Now that I mention it, the guy is in IT and can probably hack my work laptop and find this exact blog post…
Well henceforth, he will be known as Mr. Face Twitch/Awkward Coworker. If you are hacking this Mr. Face Twitch/Awkward Coworker, maybe work on your social skills and I’ll try to be more careful who I blog about 😉
Mr. Wine-No
Not too long ago, I found myself on a second date with Short Mark*. I’m allowed to actually call him Short Mark because he lied about his height. He said 5’9 on his online profile but I quickly realized on our first date he couldn’t possibly stand taller than 5’6. However, I have been trying to be more open-minded about short guys, so I chose to ignore this rather irrational lie on his part (you can’t fake height so why would you lie about it online??) and agreed to a 2nd date with him.
We went to a Brentwood Italian restaurant I had never been to before and that meal was the best part of the whole evening. He admitted to being more of a beer drinker than a wine drinker and asked if I had any wine recommendations (no judgments here; I love giving wine advice!). I said, “Since we are in an Italian restaurant, I think Chianti would be a good bet. Red wine always go well with this sort of meal and Chianti is one of the best values.” Mind you, of course I pronounced Chianti as “key-ant-ee”, as any wine lover or anyone who’s ever watched Silence of the Lambs should know to do.
The waiter asked to take our drinks order and this short dude apparently felt he was ordering for the two of us. Short Mark said, “We’ll each have a glass of the Chee-ant-ee.” I wanted to hit him across the face. The waiter grimaced and politely walked away without correcting him. It wasn’t the fact that Short Mark didn’t know how to pronounce a relatively well-known red wine. It was the fact that he clearly wasn’t listening to what I was saying as that I’m pretty sure I said the word Chianti (correctly) at least 4 times.
Needless to say, the night took a turn for the worst at that point and I haven’t seen Short Mark since.
In Preparation for Christmas.
Unless any of you have acquired a boyfriend over the last 5 weeks (kudos if so!), I felt it appropriate to post a follow-up to In Preparation for Thanksgiving. I am returning to Chicago with a massive cold (not to worry though – the doctor just gave me a bunch of drugs so I should be singing Christmas carols minus the dripping nose in no time) and am fully prepped to answer the following annoying question:
“So, why are you still single?”
I have compiled the following potential responses:
- “I don’t know; maybe I should stop telling guys on a first date that I have a dating blog.” (just kidding…this is like a 6th date revelation)
- “I keep meeting these cute guys in Orange County but once I tell them that I voted for Obama, they run away.”
- “I’m on an airplane and/or in a different city every other weekend. Apparently, most men find this detrimental in dating a person. Me? I think it’s pretty f–king rad.”
- “I have no idea. Go get me my 5th glass of champagne and let’s sit down for the next 3 hours of this holiday party to talk through all my many single person issues. And no, we’re not spending one minute talking about you.”
- “I really am holding out for Ryan Gosling. He lives in LA; I live in LA. What – is this not realistic?”
- “BECAUSE BEING SINGLE IS AWESOME.” (True story. Thanks to my friend D. for that one)
Happy Holidays everybody! To the married folks – I enjoyed all the holiday cards (who doesn’t love snail mail??) and I hope there aren’t too many in-laws and screaming children this Christmas. To the single folks – I hope there are many ugly Christmas sweater parties and drunken makeouts heading your way.
The 30Somethings.
I have received some of the same unsolicited advice over and over again over the years: date older. Because men my age (28) or younger don’t want to commit, don’t know what they want, are immature, just want to get laid (um, newsflash, all men of any age just want to get laid), have a Peter Pan complex, etc…
I tend to agree with all these points about the gentlemen of my generation. So I have — from time to time — gone on a date with the odd 30+ year old.
Guess what. Those dates with the 30somethings went worse than the dates with the 20something Peter Pans.
I’m the first to point out that I have some immature tendencies so it’s probably not a good idea to try to date a 35-year-old when I possess the mental age and maturity of 24-year-old post-college sorority idiot. That being said, I have found men in their 30s to be smarmy, arrogant, hands-y, and just kind of annoying.
Case in point: I recently went on a drinks date with Jake*, a 34-year-old real estate broker from eHarmony. When I met him outside the Santa Monica bar, my first thought was, “Is this really what 34 looks like?” Because the guy looked way older than that. But I soldiered on and gave him the benefit of the doubt that he was being truthful about his age.
The conversation went alright but I felt very self-conscious talking to him because of the disarming front he put on. For example, I was acutely aware of how often I said the word, “like” (did I mention that I really was in a sorority?). By the second drink, he tried multiple times to touch my leg, even though I was sitting pretty far from him and giving him no signals that it was okay in any way to touch me anywhere. I excused myself from the date pretty quickly after the multiple creep touch attempts and thankfully have never heard from the 34 (or 30-faux?) year old again.
2nd case in point: Mr. Pretentious.
Hopefully, this just means I’m dating the wrong 30somethings and there are plenty of lovely, not horribly jaded 30+ year olds out there. Single ladies of the Internet – what have you found? Is it better to date your age, older, or younger?
WanderLost Blog 