Tag Archives: Santa Monica

LA Bucket List.

When you have infinite time during funemployment but limited funds, you have to come up with good ways to take advantage of traffic-free LA (well between the hours of 11 AM and 3 PM) during the weekday on a budget. So I’m working on my LA bucket list to tackle when I’m in between phone interviews.

  1. Hike Runyon Canyon
  2. Visit Getty Villa
  3. Bike down the coast from Santa Monica to Hermosa
  4. Drive on Mulholland Drive
  5. Visit Turtle Races at Brennan’s
  6. Go to a Lakers or Clippers game
  7. See the stars at Bar Marmont
  8. Dim sum in Chinatown
  9. Re-visit LACMA
  10. Pizza at Pizzeria Mozza
  11. Have a drink at Roosevelt Tropicana pool in Hollywood

If anyone has any “must-dos” in LA, please let me know!

 

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Rejection.

Here’s a topic that I have not covered too much because my ego hurts too much admitting to it: rejection.

Two weeks ago, I attended a magnificent wedding of a fellow USC alum in Santa Monica and the minute I saw Mr. Best Man at the altar of the Catholic ceremony, I said – HIM. DIBS.

Now it’s not very often that I truly set my mind to something and don’t get it. 25 years ago on a cold January Chicago day, I told my mother that once I was a grown-up, I was moving to a place where I didn’t have to wear a coat (I mean, practicality at its best at age 4). 11 years ago, I walked on USC’s campus and said “Yes, I’m going to attend college here.” One year later, I started my freshman year at USC in the balmy climate of Los Angeles.

In late 2008, at the height of our failing economy, I set my mind to get a job in marketing. Granted, I got it and it sucked the soul out of me for 2.5 years. But I did it.

If the last 5+ years of dating in Southern California have taught me anything, they have taught me humility. Everyone in LA is here to get what they want.

But I digress…

Back to Mr. Best Man.

Mr. Best Man was a  Stanford grad. A former baseball player slash current personal trainer. I couldn’t have asked for a better Saturday Night Random Makeout. The competition consisted of 2 drunk bridesmaids who started at 10 AM and I had the upper sober hand.

The groom was on my side. Two groomsmen made absolutely sure we were introduced. Mr. Best Man and I danced. We took a shot. We sat and had a fun conversation over wedding cake. Then, the wedding party failed to make an after party happen and I found myself outside with a tired Best Man at midnight who just wanted to go to sleep. Alone.

And so I got into a taxi by myself. There are a million excuses for why he didn’t at least for my number but after 14+ years of dating, I know a blow-off when I see one.

The evening was a bit of a blow to my ego. Like I arrogantly said, I’m not very used to not getting what I want. I’m not used to putting myself out there and getting shot down. On top of it, it was the metaphorical nail to the coffin to what’s been a pretty terrible year of dating.

How much more of this can I really take? I’m pretty sure my standards are already dirt-level low (does he at  have a job at Radioshack? Cool! Does he have a college degree? No, but an associate’s degree will do. He lost all his hair? HA we’re only getting older. He’s bald at 30? — Let’s go!).

Go ahead, mock the anonymous blog writer. But I’m just getting real here, guys. How much more rejection and bullshit can we take?

Then there was the time my date ran away from me at the end of the night after walking me to my car. And by “that time”, I mean, last night.

Regardless, all that’s left to do is fill the hole in the ego and soldier on. Because at this point in life, you can’t just roll into a ball in the corner of your bedroom and stop trying. You save that for when you are a 50-year-old spinster with 7 cats.

The Geographically Undesirables.

There’s a term that’s very specific to the dating world of Los Angeles: Geographically Undesirable. When I receive a eHarmony mail from a cute guy in Santa Monica, I go, “eee, cute and close!” When I get a note from a cute guy in Agoura Hills, I think, “eeh, cute, but I can’t get over there on a weeknight without sitting in 2 hours of traffic. Wait – where exactly is Agoura Hills?”

It makes a world of difference if the guy lives within a 5 mile radius of you compared to if you have to cross the 405 and can’t even get on a freeway (I’m looking at you, West Hollywood). If you’re working a 10 hour+ day (cough cough aka my life), you really don’t have time to commute for a date. You barely have time to exercise and grab a quick glass of wine out at a bar before bed.

I once had a Wednesday night date in Los Feliz that I sat in 1 hour and 20 mins of traffic to get to and was subsequently 30 minutes late for the date. He was miffed I was late and I was fuming out of hunger, frustration, and concluded no man was ever worth venturing to Los Feliz for on a weekday night. Clearly, the two of us didn’t work out.

I mean, even NASA knows better than to go to the Valley.

Image: #WhenInLA

And this illustration pretty much sums up all my feelings. Courtesy of my dad (he knows me all too well).

That being said, I know the first-hand stories of the long distance relationships where people even got on airplanes to meet up with the men they loved and it all worked out. So maybe I should try venturing east of the 405.

Ladies – sound off! Is this just a LA problem? How far are you willing to venture for a date? What’s an acceptable radius?